Sunday, October 16, 2011

the best thing in the whole world

I have something to admit...

I was a closet writer for a very long time. And when I say a very long time, I mean years. I didn’t want anyone to know what I was doing with my spare time or why I liked it so much. Well, I finally figured out why. I realized that I’ve been so fearful about exposing my work. I mean, I thought I could write pretty well. But maybe the rest of the world wouldn't think so too. What if I was really awful and I was clouded by my own judgment? Like the singers people make fun of on American Idol, who truly believe they have talent, but should only be singing in the shower- I wasn’t one of those people was I?

That thought was unnerving, definitely. There isn’t anything else I want to do with my life. I don’t have another passion just as strong. So instead, I kept my writing a secret and gave myself the whole “one day” mental speech, where I promised myself that I would expose my writing when the time was right. Sidenote: I'm a perfectionist and a procrastinator, and those two traits do not go together in harmony. Anyway, I’ve faced my fears since then, but this is not exactly the point of the story.

The real point is that lately I’ve been receiving positive feedback about my work. Granted, I’m still a fairly new author, so I haven’t received a ton of feedback. But so far, I’ve been amazed each time it happens. And the very first time I read something nice from someone, I actually became a little teary-eyed- which is totally embarrassing and I definitely shouldn’t be revealing it here. But it happened. And it was the best feeling in the whole world. For me, it validated the hard work I put into writing Wanderlove. And it made me feel like I touched someone’s life, even if it was only in a small way. That was all I ever wanted from the moment I picked up a pen in grade school, scribbling secret stories in my notebook. I hope I can continue to do it again and again and again. Because it really is the best feeling in the entire world.

Quote of the day:
"We can do no great things, only small things with great love." ~Mother Teresa

1 comment:

  1. I absolutely loved this post. I felt the same way! I wrote in private because I was afraid to put myself out there at first. Now that I have put myself out there I realize that I am able to take any negative comments and I LOVE getting positive feedback. :) I think we put so much of ourselves in our writing that when we expose ourselves we feel vulnerable at first.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

    P.S. I figured out how to comment on your blog- sort of. I have to hold down Ctrl and click all over the place until there is a box for me to type the verification in and then do the same thing trying to get the submit button to pop up. I am not sure why that is a problem- but I am glad I figured out a way to comment because you have some interesting posts!